2. C2
"Holy shit, did that cat just talk?”
Perk Obtained: Language Skills
Several humans stared him down.
Then the voice chimes again.
You have earned experience for participating in a battle.
Level up.
You have one perk point to spend.
This was all new and all confusing. Perk points? Humans talking to him? Bagel needed time to get all of this. He wanted to be understood. Humans wanted to do that, right?
This was difficult. He tried speaking again. He opened his mouth and said, “Meow.”
The woman with the short dyed blonde hair shook her head. "Hey, maybe you need to get your head checked, Holly."
"Lisa, you have got to be kidding me. The cat called that damn taxi driver an asshole, and- God damn! This is some bullshit.” She looked at Bagel, then at the store behind him. “Cat, do you have any hard liquor?"
Behind them were dead pizza rat mobs. Large yellow and red rats the size of dogs dotted all of second avenue going north and south. There were some still in a pitched battle with humans but most were dead.
Golden cards appeared over each of the dead rats. The humans all invariably picked them up one by one to examine them. That seemed like something that he should do.
"Maybe" Bagel said, mimicking what he had heard the workers say hundreds of times.
Holly's mouth hung open wide enough to allow a rat entry. "See!? I'm not crazy! That cat did just speak.And he’s on this…dude what’s up with that person he is on."
"Sir, you know that you have a talking cat on your shoulder, right?” Lisa said.
"To the store.” Bagel huffed. His mount turned, facing the glass door.
Bagel could use voice commands to move his minions.
"Guard." The second mount, a man who looked like he cooked pizza regularly and a rat that had probably overdosed on pizza stepped out.
It felt surreal to be speaking, after all the years of non-verbal communication.
Several of the humans moved to get the glowing packs above the carcasses of the rats. To Bagel's surprise, the pizza rats had disappeared. That might take the fun out of killing things. Was it really killing if you didn’t have a body to bring home and show the humans?
One had to show off their stuff, after all.
The two humans that had previously conversed with him, followed him, and marveled at the shop. What were they possibly expecting? Unless…
"You would think that everything is the same, looking at this place,, but we got these decks now. Wait, why hasn't the power gone out?" The brunette pulled out her phone. "Five bars? In the middle of the apocalypse? I'm going to call my mom."
"We could die any time, so I'm getting snacks," the woman with the braids commented.
"Okay, Holly," the other nodded, as she made her call.
Bagel assumed his usual spot. It was the place next to where people put their stuff on the counter. Soft, and generally welcoming. People loved seeing a cat there, and he liked being seen.
"First time selling stuff, eh?" Holly asked.
Bagel remembered Holly. She had always smelled like dogs and sweat before, whenever she visited the shop in some kind of work uniform or something. It was mostly green.
"Yes, I uh..." Bagel trailed off, unsure of how to respond to that.
"Well, you look like you're doing your best," she smiled down at him fondly. "Can I pet your head? It's not weird if I say that, right? I know you’re a distinguished talking cat and all, but still."
Bagel had no idea why it would be weird. It was just a woman patting his head, and he was used to such love. In fact, it was absolutely necessary for him.
"Go on," he encouraged, his tail flicking back and forth. "I insist."
With a squeal, Holly proceeded to do just that.
"I've never pet a talking cat before.”
The other woman, presumably done with her call, returned with a bottle that he recognized as Malt Liquor.
His brain told him that this cost five dollars or one credit. No, that wasn’t his brain, that was the system.
But what in cat’s paws was a dollar?!
"Five dollars or one credit," he tested the word on his tongue, finding that it rolled off easily. . Something about this felt new, and… crunchy.
And Bagel liked crunchy snacks.
"Credit?" Lisa asked, peering down upon him, with glee.
"Didn't we get credit for being in that fight?" Holly asked Lisa.
"Ahem. ID’s, please. Cash or Credit?" he inquired again, feeling exceedingly pleased with himself.
In all honesty, he had no idea how any of this worked, but his perk was telling him what to do, and he was going with it. It was a little nudge, like the instinct that reminded him to watch out for kittens. He barely remembered what a kitten was, and yet had a whole mindset about them. It told him that if he sold items, then he would get money and with money… he could do a lot.
"This has got to be the second weirdest thing that has happened today," Holly finally exclaimed, putting the items she’d picked out on the counter.
Bagel mentally pushed his minion to scan the items. That was what they were supposed to do, right? Then they would say a number, and then the other humans would do either something with their hands, or exchange bills.
Really, these humans had so many rituals! He was only now grasping that there was significance to them.
"Oh hey. What about the cards we got?" Holly said. "This one summons a pizza rat."
"Far better than my golden retriever deck. Hold on, let me find my credit card."
He heard mention of them getting a card and wanted to ask more but thought better of it. They might volunteer information themselves, but he wasn't going to pry.
"Say, what would you give me for this card," the girl with the braids said.
She held up the same card that he had in his deck.
"Huh. Another forty ounce bottle?" Bagel said.
"Deal." She plopped down the card, then ran back and grabbed a bottle of yellow fluid.
"You know I never thought I would go down fighting monsters while wielding card powers," Lisa said, after putting a bill on the counter.
"How about next to a friend, then?" Holly quipped, placing another pizza rat card on the counter.
Both humans opened their drinks and took a big swig. They stepped out of the store, joyous despite the new world they were walking into.
He was already thinking about how he would need to reorganize the store. Little nudges by the system were telling him that he could change things. He wondered if that was by design, and then he wondered what design actually meant.
So many new concepts were just rushing through his mind, and he was unsure of how to approach everything.The system was trying to guide him to do things. It wasn’t telling him to do anything directly, but it planted ideas into his mind.
Like, of course, that he was a cat and this was his domain, and that he was the new manager, but he had never had an attack or a defense stat.
Not that he knew what that really meant..
With everything happening around him, he regarded the shop. Bagel had lived here for as long as he could remember. He tried to think of the situation a different way. He came up with nothing. He felt the same. He had no desire to go outside. He might go hunt in a while, but right now? The shop was his for the first time ever.
Not only was he the manager, he was the de facto owner.
What a strange world.
He had his mount spread out the two cards that he had been paid in, and examined them. He also held up the dollar bills.
There was a blinking icon in his vision, and he took a second to see it.
Combat reward: Five credits.
It felt like he could activate the credits and just make them appear, so he did. Each credit looked like a small silver square with an engraving. They appeared out of thin air. He held a paw up and willed them to move. Nothing happened, which was a bit disappointing.
He was going to have to figure out what credits were, and then how math worked. Were cats even meant to do math? But, then again, cats weren't supposed to talk either.
"Can I get a perk about math?" he mused aloud. The system was not helpful with an easy answer.
"Pardon me, boss," Bagel's mount said. "We know basic math and can run the store while we are summoned."
"That is good to know. How long can I uh...summon you for?" Bagel said.
"As long as you want, but you have to dedicate one energy to our upkeep each, and you max out at three right now."
Standing on a human felt right in the back of his mind, though the shoulders seemed to be the best place for it.
"Well, that’s good to know," Bagel said. "I guess I have a lot to learn. The system made me know important things, but other than that I'm a bit lost here."
"You still want to run the store,right?" The mount asked him.
"I want to run my store."
A glint passed through his eye.
The one thing that he had no clue about was how he was going to restock everything the humans bought. But that was a worry for another time.
Another human walked into the shop, this one short and blonde.
"Hey... You guys are still open for business? Even with all of this going on?" she said, moving to the counter, trying to talk to his mount
"We are," Bagel affirmed.
The woman almost fell backwards, eyes bulging outwards comically. "Holy shit, a talking cat."
That was going to get old fast.
"I've got a pizza rat card for sale if you want one," Bagel said. "Also, yes. I am a cat. I have a feeling that I should have a sign made."
"Oh? How much?" she asked, seemingly accepting that the talking cat was a part of the new normal.
"How's five bucks?" It wasn't a hard bargain, and not too expensive either. Bagel didn't want to lose a potential repeat customer. "Or a trade for any other card. That is acceptable."
"Five bucks works," she said. "I don't have any cards yet. But, apparently, if I get ten then I can have a proper functioning deck."
Oh? That was new information. Bagel mentally catalogued it for future musing.
"Alright. Well, thanks for dropping in. Tell all your friends that we are still open."
She nodded as she left, dropping the cash on Bagel's mount’s hand.
"I'm probably going to need more cards. They seem like a hot commodity," he remarked.
"Hey, boss, maybe you should un-summon one of us or inspect your cards," his mount helpfully interjected.
"That's a good plan. How do I do that?"
The mount explained that he could examine them by touching his chest and just thinking about it.
He did so to pull up what he had. He had three cards in his deck that were not ones he had already drawn or inspected.
Fast order chef
HP 50
Attack 10 -50% Chance for poisoning
Weak Against Paper Type Attacks
There are no more feared enemies to a cook than the NYC board of sanitation.
Bodega
Persistent
This card may be used as a persistent base and will work with water and electric hook ups. The owner can buy adjacent plots unless owned. The owner makes a cut of all profits made off the top; adjustable rate is set by the user. The store interface adapts to the user.
Restock
Supportive Card
Will restock the inventory of any vending machine, fridge or shop in your possession. Replenishes ten credits equivalent per draw, max of thirty per day.